Return a favor?! Why should I?!

We stand here staring down the hard path but when it really comes down to it do we really take that path or do we just turn and run for the path more traveled?! We have a fear of unknown and yet don't have a fear of the known? We waste our life thinking about things that could happen while things that do happen just pass on by. It's like we know that the world is spinning but no one takes any notice of when it starts to slow. 

But that's the problem. We're here, all of us together but no matter what people say, people live as if they are the only one that matters. They wouldn't lift a finger to help their fellow man but if it came down to their property they would take on a whole army of tigers just to protect it. We need to learn the lesson of loving your friends and caring for you enemies.We need to realize that not only do we matter but so does everyone else. Every action has a consequence, every change we make to our daily lives can change the course of history, everything matters.

Thousand jests can not satnd to one insult

          Sometimes we take a small joke too seriously and yes sometime people need to calm down but it's equally true that some of us make jokes at others expense way to often. We make these jokes thinking it won't hurt anyone, but sometimes we go to far. Passing from a mere joke of someones attitude to a insult to their personal character.
           People put up with being made fun of and joked at and insulted every day of their lives. Either it be to their face or behind their back they know it happens and most of them put up with it. But it hurts to have someone you truly care about call you an idiot, a failure, a self-obsessed jerk... But these people do this without even a second thought. We call people we love idiots, or make fun of an attempt they make at something or just plain right insult them and think nothing of it. But maybe we should. Maybe for once in our life we should try to go a full day without hurting someone with out making jokes at someone else's expense. Try it! I dare you. You might even realize how much you are doing it and try to better yourself. Hey you might even Save A Life.

Signs?! What's the point?!

 So I'm skateboarding along just minding my own buisness listening to music when BAM! I get stuck on a sign that's fallen over. No I don't mean some stop sign or a yield sign, no it's a sign saying "Hey middle class family, I'm here to help you so vote NPD" or something along those lines. But really, I come out of my concentration over pushing along to take a look around and all I can see is "Vote..." or "Don't vote...." or even "hey look what he did isn't that horrible! Vote for me!". Well to be honest with such a show of waste I'd rather not vote for any of them! These signs stay there for what four to six weeks, maybe seven. Then what? do they recycle them?! No. They either take them to the dump or just leave them fallen over on the side of the road! If you want my vote instead of making three hundred signs go make a playground or build a shelter for people who don't have homes to use! Because unlike these signs it shows that you actually want to change something!

What is love?!

I come close, you push me away. I try to be distant as not to anger you, and it backfires and you say your loosing interest?! Just a question, how can you loose interest? If I love someone I never loose interest, I always care and that doesn't stop. Not ever. But whatever, I could get past that. But the matter of fact is that when I try; when anyone tries people just throw it at them and if they give up because they can't even see the light at the end of the tunnel, they get burnt. They loose. As always. They shrink back to what they were in the past and can't come out because no one can help them only they can better the sores left in their mind. Scars that build walls. Walls that build fortresses. And eventually forts that build hatred and war ending in a cacophony of madness and depression....

So what is love?! A never ending spiral of hate and compassion. Something so few experience because people can't see past what they think because they're so into the idea of getting everything they ever wished for? Is it being hurt, and left for dead only to go back and spring the trap yet again shutting the barbed teeth on your heart? To be honest I don't know what love is exactly, but what I do know is I feel it. For you and for everyone. I care without return, give without regret, I try to be compassionate and yes sometimes I fall behind and fall in line with everyone else but to be honest I do my best to stand up for love in it's original stage. Not some "I want to get laid" antics of a horny teenager but of unbroken caring and undeserved forgiveness. So you know what if you hurt me and you're reading this I'm sorry if I had harsh feelings but I forgive you...

unknown

What would I be if I died this moment?
A brother, a son, a friend, another ex lover?

How would I be remembered?
A photo, a word, a whisper, just an other RIP status?

Even more so, who will remember me?
Friends and family? Brothers and sisters? Enemies and lovers alike?

If I even am remembered, then for how long?
Some say they wouldn't forget, but I've heard it before.

We all have memories of distant pasts,
once so vivid, now they fade so fast

Am I just an other toy in this life of loss?
A one night stand and something to toss?


Well it doesn't matter.
'Cause in the end you weren't even my friend...

LOVE

I'd love to know why it's so wrong now a days to love everything? There's so much hate, so many things we could prevent by just being nice. But yet everyday we turn people away, ignore others needs and then when someone calls you out on your actions we respond with "Hey it's none of my business". Well you know what people it is your business!
What happens when your harsh words are the ones that trigger the suicide thoughts? What happens when the ignorence you showed to someone is the reason they bring the gun to school. We hear about these school shootings or these work shootings and think "Oh it's somewhere else that could never happen here in my little town!". But hey look around there's suicides, murders, and even rapes all around the world everyday. And we're here saying "Hey don't love him thats wrong!" or "Hey you shouldn't support her she did this...". Why can't we all just get along and let it go...For once let love flow abundant and free...

The Gourd

Life like a gourd I'm a hollowed out shell of what I was grown as.
A thing for people to admire and yet never know what I could have been,
I could have been the envy of all and yet everything  that has happened has hollowed me
Everything that could have been is now gone.
But now I'm a shell, stuck on a shelf

A figurine of childish laughter
That some see as art
And some see as pointless wastes of time.
A shell of what could have been....

A shadow

What happens when you turn on the light?

The shadows are chased out by the bright.
But when it come in reverse
The night comes back, dark and perverse.
The thoughts of monster of lust and agony
Come running like a ragging cacophony
The crimes streak the night like the sun breaks the day
And we stand here out of the way
Like it doesn't matter, like we don't ever care
We just keep on moving and pretend to be unaware

Like a match dropped in the middle of the forest
A fire that spreads like a  directed blaze in all directions
We all want to stop it but how can we?
How can we stop a fire that has been growing since before we were born?
How can all the pain and suffering stop?
The answer it can't and it won't
Like a small child standing still as the sun goes down... An ever growing shadow

Life

Life is but a wave
An endless cycle of water being pushed at a destination
I move away then turn and charge at my goals
Only to hit the edge and turn back for another go
And yet I always try to no avail.
But I go again, I can't help but do it, I must
For if I do not then why am I here?
Me? A wave that like all others will never reach what I wish to grasp
Never to finish the last goal
Always to fall back and begin yet again
To restart my futile attempts at happiness

But I'll keep on trying and maybe I'll make it.
And yet then again maybe I won't....

But all I know is I shall try.

I will try.....

When the walls fall down

What happens when all you know, everything that you love turns around and bites you. Life seems to have no end and yet could be ended so easily, could be gone with a flash, a bang, a whip, a smash.... It seems so easy to imagine that it can end right now. At the very moment that you're reading this you could pass out hit your head, or a heart attack and end up dead! What happens when you finally realize how mortal your body really is. How no matter what you do from a certain point on it goes downhill, and then we look around us. What do we see? People taking these body's they have; these miracles, these slabs of impossibility, that they don't seem to even care about! They inject, inhale, consume, abuse, or just plain don't use their body's in ways that you can't even imagine. And yet they're still there. No one is here telling them that "Hey you. You are acting like a idiot." You're given this shell; yeah I call it a shell cause now people think they can take a brain out throw it in a new body and bam! whole new person yet still have the same brain. Anyway; we have this shell, like a turtle. But unlike a turtle we don't have the simple life of eat, sleep, re-produce, swim and repeat. If we did I'm sure there would be a lot more of us. But instead we have different lives for each of us. Yeah we still have the main things like eat and sleep and swim.... Okay maybe not swim. But the point is we have the basics but then we have the differences. Some are alcoholics filling their system with poisons. Others are drug abusers, using unhealthy plants and substances to "relax" or "let go". Some overwork them selves to the point of death and some over "use" themselves to the point of depression. But no matter what you end up doing at least one bad thing to your body, cause that's the world. But there are so many who just throw it away by living there lives inside the shell and just let their lives pass them by or end it because they can't stand the life they've chosen. Don't be that person live it to the fullest cause you only live once.

Sheding

My Brain is so gone. So far from where I began. A world away and no way back, no way that I can ever be who I used to be. Innocent, small, joyous! Things I've shed like a snake and it's skin. The past is gone and yet I can't bear to look to the future, where I will still be more different.
          I look in the mirror and I see not myself but a stranger. Someone who I would never have even been seen with if I was still half the person I used to be. Yet her I am; I've been through heart break and addictions, break downs and my mind's own fictions. Days where I could barely go on and days where giving up would never even cross my mind. Times where the only person in the world that could hold me up doesn't even care about me anymore and times where I'd give anything for what I had between us to just have never happened. Most days I wake to thought of "Am I dead?.... No. Well time to start an other day that I'll screw up", but even if I live that day and do screw up I try my best to forget fast, live in the present and forget the past. And yet there it is every time I see a picture, read a note or a word that came from this person or that one, it all come rushing back like walking along and finding an old snake skin. What  if a snake found it's old skin? Does it remember why pieces are missing? Does it have memories that it will trigger. My old skins do and they aren't always the best memories.

Scars

Picture it: You look down and see a long white line running down your leg. A thought always comes to mind: "Wow that really hurt" or "HA! What a fun night that was". But no matter what it's still there isn't it? Isn't that one part of your body always going to have a little thing reminding you of that time and what not to do or maybe what to do. But I think there are Scars that go deeper then flesh. Scars that go all the way in, deep enough that it holds you back from things that could make you so happy, yet because of a scar or a break in you're mind you're too crippled to try to do these things. To trust, to love, to be caring and close to someone, maybe to even take risks at all. Sometimes it goes to the back of your mind and you seem to be fine for a while but then something happens and it's like someone took and sliced that scar open so that you have to live through the pain all over again, they make it so that one thing is yet again something you fear. Something strange and distant that can never again be regained in your life, something that you can see other people doing but are to afraid or to weary to do yourself.
             Sometimes to get past these things you have to let go of things, sometimes new things are needed. But just be cause we "get by them" doesn't mean that they are gone. A cut may heal but scars last a life time

A mirror or a image

Why is that whenever I look in the mirror I immediately check my face over. I find one thing I don't like about my features, and all a sudden  all I can focus on is that one thing. All I can think about is how that everyone is going to notice that I have a pimple or that I have slight shadow. But lately I've been asking myself "Why should I care what they think?". Now I'm seriously thinking about and it's true, Why should I care?! It's not like what these few people thing is going make my life go into a pit of despair if they don't like how my hair looks! So why care?! I care because there are people I'd like to impress but now I don't care about the rest. If you're going to judge someone on how they dress or look on one occasion then maybe you don't deserve to have me as a friend or even an acquaintance. Why is it that we constantly put ourselves deown because some media loving magazine says that this is out and this is in!? Why can't people just throw what they want on and still be the same person why do people have to change to be "IN", to be honest if what they show is "IN" I'd quite rather be Out! You watch these "Olay" commercials and there's these people that are always so skinny and no acne and no scars, and then they have the boldness to say "Love the skin you're in!"!??! What do they think these commercials make you feel you look at the people in the commercial and say "Hey I want to be perfect like that!" but their motto is love your own skin. If you ask me it's just a huge contradiction! So who cares what people look at you like jut look back at them and send them love because it's them who need the pity. I don't care if my hair's a little off! It's them who is going to be worrying all the time what others think and ruining there time! So relax and just go with the flow be mellow and compassionate. 

-Jon

Paths of life.

Most people have choices they need to make. These choices can be as small as should I eat breakfast or should I walk into school today and be good? But there are the harder ones like "What religion should I be?" "Should I ask out that girl/guy that I have been in love since grade seven?". These choices can be scary sometimes even terrifying, but yet we are faced with them constantly. These life changing, dream making choices. But what do some of us do? We turn and run as fast as we can! We look everywhere for a place we can hide. But these choices are like the most talented hunters to ever be in reality. Eventually they find you no matter what you do these choices will find you, because if it's a choice we think is worth hiding from it is a choice that we must really have to make.
But why hide from choices?! Why try to avoid the one thing in life that we have the freedom to change. Why avoid one thing we can actually control unlike the weather or the time or the state of other people's minds? Why give away our own freewill? Because we're scarred we'll make the wrong choice? Well how are you going to know which choice is wrong if you never take a chance to find out?! How can you live the rest of your long life not knowing what would happen if you had of made this choice? What would have happened had I told them this.  You live in these shadows whenever you don't make a choice. Sometimes, yeah you will regret a choice but in the words of a song it says "There's only us, only this. Forget regret or life is your's to miss". These lyrics are so true! You can't be afraid to take a chance at something, because life can be changed or even taken at any moment. Any moment a truck or a tiger could burtt through your wall and you'd be gone. What happens then? The one thing you always wondered "What if?" about will never be answered!

So go out on a limb! Try something you've been wanting to for a long time or just try something new.

No matter what, It does matter

Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi, a man with wisdom beyond what some can imagine. He may not have been smart or a genius but he was wise. 

 But when I was watching a movie today it mentioned a quote. Robert Pattinson he said "Gandhi once said that whatever you do in life will be insignificant but it is very important that you do it.." 

Gandhi was assassinated after all his life of trying to conduct peace and harmony he was killed by the one thing he hated in the world. Violence. Gandhi on the other hand did so much in his life that some people would say "Well Gandhi can say this because everything he did actually did matter waht can I do that matters!?". Well first of all yeah he did some VERY important things but so can you! So maybe you won't end a war or reign over a country and change the worlds view of set country; but maybe, just maybe you'll do something important even if it's saying hello to a person who seems lonely or offering your jacket to someone who is cold, maybe even giving a dollar to someone who needs it more then you do! But the point is anything can make the difference. So why not make it count? Why not try your best to make the things that you do that will be important be important in a good way not a bad one. Remember sometimes it's easier to save a life then you think.

Walls

Everyday most of us are hurt by someone. Whether it's as simple as someone telling us we're wrong or as harsh as telling someone they are horrible and should die, or breaking up with them. But because of these things we put up what some people call walls. 

I guess some of them can be called walls. But hey some can be called fences like being timid to be weird because someone said it's weird to weird (what's up with that?!) but what about the ones that are from real hurts like someone you care about lying to you or finding out that the person you thought you could trust more then anyone in this world has been lying to you your whole relationship? What then? Should we call these gigantic walls we put up around or emotion castles? Maybe fortifications? Or maybe a bomb shelter. Call it what you may but we all have them.

These things are our most insecure thoughts. Maybe thoughts of "Oh I'm not good enough for him/her!" or "Why can't I be like everyone else?!". Why do we think these things?! Is it because most people now in today's times think that it's not cool or not right for people to think for themselves and want everyone to have the same images in their minds about how people should be?! But if ask me we are a generation that is letting self purpose die, we constantly put down people for being themselves and say everyone should be a certain way! You know what I say to the people saying that?! I say "Well have fun being a bunch of clones who can't be free". Please help yourself and dare to be different, because if you don't you will regret it.

Tick, Tick, Tick

Most people think of a clock; maybe even a watch when they hear or read the words "Tick, Tick, Tick". But to me it's something so much more then that. It's the pass of time, the beat of my heart the thing that reminds me that I'm not dead to be truthful. Wake up in the morning and the first thing I do is ask "am I dead" I hear the tick and I know I am not.Sometimes I curse the fact that I was born a cripple. Maybe not something that everyone can notice but something that truly does effect my life greatly. But I also love it because it's sets me apart from all the clones of today society. I mean what have we come to when being yourself is something you get beat up for?! What happens when a boy or girl comes to school dressed in a way they like?! They get made fun of and picked on. Even harassed to the pint that they take their own life?! Is this what WE want. Because it surely isn't what I want. I wish that when I was younger I wasn't picked on until I was on the verge of tears! Maybe I wouldn't be the way I am today. But one thing I'm glad did happen was that I took a lesson from it. I have done my best in life to treat people the way I should. Yes I have messed up on very many occasions. But I also have made many people just that much happier by being a kind person and maybe saying a gentle word to them. So why can't we all do it?! Why can't it be a time when everyone treats people right and gives respect to those that need it the most. If you read this tell someone something today that will make them feel better, even if it's just a simple "Hi. I'm so glad I have you as a friend"; for someone it may be the difference between life and death. Because I know on more then one occasion it was for me...

Bible thumping: Sometimes it helps

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you"<><> I wish more people would live by these words. Sure some people say "Oh hey that's from the bible I'm not some bible thumping hypocrite who thinks he's better then everyone else so why should I listen to that?!". But Really if you took the words into considerations you would see it's so much more then a sentence. If everyone treated people how they themselves would want to be treated, wouldn't we all be better off? We wouldn't have girls looking at themselves and thinking how ugly they are when in truth they are beautiful, we wouldn't have people committing suicide everyday in our country even in our province. If people tried a little harder I'm sure we could make the difference.